Does Justin have a hero fantasy? Is Martin too old to start learning Judo? Who should be responsible for the care and maintenance of one's beard? The Two Bearded Preachers spend their time discussing these and other questions in this episode. Listen as Martin creates a Zen-like atmosphere in his home. Justin talks about his past as an Anglican. The Real Man American calls in to call Martin out about giving the sex talk to his elementary age kids. Both of the preachers talk about Ash Wednesday and Lent, communicating their respective skepticism about the practice. Can you smell the popery? You'll also get some tips on how to best maintain your firearms for minimal government interference. Talk about a wide-ranging conversation.
Would you like to join the conversation? Call the Two Bearded Preachers at 951-472-3273 and you may just be chosen to be on an episode. You can talk to us on Facebook or stop by Justin's house late in the evening for a friendly visit.
This just in... middle aged men aren't good at online video games. In this episode of Two Bearded Preachers, Martin admits he isn't very good at promoting the podcast or playing online video games. Justin overshares about marital issues and plays too many video games. Both offer their advice to an expectant father about the horrors he is about to experience in raising his very own baby. Justin goes on and on about how he is likely to die in his mid-fifties and Martin goes through the whole circle of emotions as he relives his 37th birthday. It's a conversation for the ages so be sure to check it out.
Want to join the conversation? You can call the Two Bearded Preachers at 951-472-3273 and be on an upcoming episode. Join the Two Bearded Preachers facebook page and try to tweet at us @twobearded.
You asked for it and we delivered! Dad Fail Friday, where you can feel better about yourself when you hear how awful Justin and Martin are at parenting. In this episode, Martin admits that there is no reason he hasn't signed his son up for Judo lessons, even though he's been meaning to for over a year. Justin fails by keeping his kids out late to watch NXT wrestling on a school night while shouting mean things at the Drifter. None of this behavior is appropriate and you should feel ashamed for laughing.
Want to join the conversation? You can call the Two Bearded Preachers at 951-472-3273 or join the Facebook group. We are @twobearded on Twitter, but we never check the feed.
The Two Bearded Preachers are trying their hardest to make those church gains, but what is the best way to measure success in ministry? Is it about leading people to grow the organization, or is there something more to it than that? In this episode, Justin and Martin talk about their criteria for successful ministry and point out that pastoring a church is fundamentally different than leading in the marketplace. Martin shares some demotivational techniques and Justin pretty much preaches his entire sermon for Sunday. This episode is outrageous!
The Two Bearded Preachers spend the episode discussing the meaning of life and whether or not the decisions we make matter. They comment on the fact that the listener doesn't get to hear the entire conversation since recording began well after they started talking. Justin gets his pump on and brags about his biceps. Martin is unimpressed and points out where his partner is wrong. Will listening to this episode matter in your life? One of us says yes, the other thinks it might not. Rest assured, it will make you happier than you were either way.
Justin and Martin talk about the golden era of television we are currently enjoying. The conversation begins with the rumors of a new Firefly series Fox seems willing to work on if only Joss Whedon will get on board. Then they discuss the joys of Burn Notice and Smallville before moving on to film. Neither of the Two Bearded Preachers are super excited about movies coming out this year with the exception of Lego Batman, Spiderman Homecoming, Guardians of the Galaxy, and pretty much any other MCU or DC movie. Maybe they are more interested in the 2017 movie scene than they say... Martin talks about the joy of Rogue One in Imax 3D and Justin spoils Split, the latest M. Night Shyamalan movie, for himself (don't worry, there aren't any spoilers in the episode). After all that they still find time to talk about how Martin's daughter broke her arm doing a back hand spring. What a glorious episode for your listening pleasure!
It's the newest episode of the Two Bearded Preachers! Justin and Martin discuss the role of emotions in the worship service and ask if they do themselves a disservice by minimizing emotional responses in the church. Martin talks about his experience at the Glennville Community Revival where Dr. Ron Archer pushed him out of his comfort zone. Justin shares how his son, Jonas, handled a bully at school with style and grace. Both share about how playing Diablo 3 is a spiritual exercise. Don't misbehave with that garlic bread, treat yourself with podcast gold instead. This episode is carbohydrate free.
Martin W. Bender
Fusion is an explanation of the assimilation program Nelson Searcy utilizes in his local church. It has many practical suggestions on how a congregation can be more effective at interacting with guests and engaging them outside the walls of the church facility. The book is all about function and encouraging the reader to be intentional about moving the first-time guest into fully engaged member of the church.
Fusion is not a book on ecclesiology. In fact, the greatest frustration I had with the book was the lack of clarity concerning what the responsibilities and privileges of church membership are for the individual. He does make the point very clear that membership is for believers, but it saddens me that such a point must be made in a book discussing how to appropriately assimilate people into the church. When a congregation lacks a clear understanding of the nature of the church any assimilation program will resort to pragmatism. How pragmatic were the first Christians in the establishment and building of the church?
In my congregation, we need to do a better job of listening to our membership. The systems that have been effective in the past are no longer working due to societal shifts. With this in mind, we will begin using some of the ideas presented in the book, but at the same time, we are developing and teaching a thorough ecclesiology in order to ensure our methodology is consistent with scripture.
Searcy, Nelson with Jennifer Dykes Henson. Fusion: Turning first-time guests into fully-engaged members of your church. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2007.
The Two Bearded Preachers once again take on the controversial topic of facial profiling when Martin shares how his fanboy interaction with JD Hall left him feeling marginalized due to his fabulous face mane (apparently, he looks like he's in the Reformed Pub). Justin, enraged at the lack of common courtesy, threatens to begin a trolling campaign on his behalf. The conversation mellows as the two friends turn toward the upcoming Ligonier National Conference where Justin hopes to find some Abolish Human Abortion protestors to troll if only he can get a ticket. In the end, Martin has a positive view of Facebook because Scott Bradley of Post Modern Jukebox played his "Desperado" request during a Facebook Live interaction. It seems all is made right with the world by the end of this incredible, two-part extravaganza of hilarity.
Have Justin and Martin become crotchety in their old age? You'll probably say yes after listening to this episode where neither can keep their cool in social media interactions. Both feed the trolls in spite of knowing better and end up more upset than any reasonable person should become. They also talk about how the upcoming Royal Rumble will undoubtedly be the best until the next one rolls around and talk a little Christian anthropology. All that and a bonus episode to follow since they kept talking long into the night. Here's the first half, with Two Bearded Preachers episode 66B to follow in just a little bit.
Facial profiling is not a victimless crime. Justin and Martin share about the times they were facially profiled in their second outing in the podcasting world. Listen as strange echoes, mysterious buzzing, and voice fade out plagues the bearded brothers. This episode is obviously one of their first as it sounds even worse than normal. Do you remember when they called the show "Partially Informed"? You will after listening to this throwback show! #endfacialprofiling
What is the best way to annoy your wife and all the people at the Starbucks? Use a Fidget Cube. Justin shares his experience with the world's most useless start-up and his concerns about the fire that recently took place at the Sausage Castle (surprisingly, it's not a breakfast place). Martin tries to figure out how evangelism, discipleship, and knowledge are related and shares how optimistic he is about the new year. Both of the fellers remember the rules at FCC and sort of understand them, but not really. What a fantastic conversation!
Martin W. Bender
Within the first few pages of Ignite, I knew where the book was going to go. Searcy references Rick Warren’s The Purpose-Driven Church by sharing the all too familiar target analogy. The idea is simple: move people from the community into the core of the congregation. This book focuses on how to bring people from the community into the crowd of folks attending so they can later move closer and closer to the center of the target: the core.
The genius of the book is that it has sequels built in. The outline is already set, all one must do is write out a methodology for moving from one group to the next, add some fictitious examples, and blammo! Book deal.
Don’t get me wrong, the book isn’t terrible. In fact, it has some good ideas in it, but it seems like a rehashing of Warren’s uber popular church growth book and I had already read that one. Anywho… let’s get on with the good stuff.
The basic gist of Searcy’s method is to have a big event that is built up for several weeks, supported through marketing channels, executed with a high degree of professionalism, and actively followed up upon. Most ministers know the days where they will have higher than average attendance. Emphasize these days, plan well for them in the preaching plan, encourage the congregation to invite folks, challenge the whole congregation to something greater on those days, and follow up with guests. That’s the whole book.
The best idea to take from Ignite is the idea of consistency in communication. Searcy seems to argue that the best boot to ground measure to take in developing an evangelistic spirit with the congregation is to continuously communicate the need of the people to evangelize. He recommends peppering all the functions of the church evangelism as a value so that people are more likely to engage in the activity. When the people internalize this oft-repeated message they will naturally begin bringing others into the crowd gathering for worship.
The worst part of the book is Searcy’s rather flippant understanding of evangelism. He tends to use the word as if it means inviting people to church. That isn’t evangelism. Evangelism is the communication of the Gospel to the nonbeliever. In the system described, the work of the church member isn’t evangelism, but an invitation to be evangelized by another. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it’s a mistake to call something evangelism that’s really promotion. Maybe I’m just being a snob here, but it seems like a problem to me.
Ignite reads quick and has some good methods for making the most out of big days in the life of the congregation. It heavily relies upon Rick Warren and the Saddleback methodology for church growth. It has been proven effective in numerous locations around the US and may just work in your area as well. There’s nothing ground breaking in the book making it required reading, but it isn’t a waste of time either. If you hate Rick Warren, and I know some of you do, don’t bother with this one.
Searcy, Nelson with Jennifer Dykes Henson. Ignite: How to spark immediate growth in your church. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2009.
Is Troll Hunter viable entertainment? What about Troll Hunters? Justin and Martin discuss this in the first episode of 2017. Over the course of the conversation, you'll find out why Justin has a new found respect for government, how Martin is going to score a new diploma, and the reason neither plan on moving to Canada any time soon. At the same time, the wonders of Netflix are navigated for you as the bearded brothers share their very favorite recommendations and hear a few pet peeves about television along the way. You'll also find out why Gen X people have trouble getting along with Millennials, the joys of Steaksgiving, and an update on Justin's curse. This episode certain covers a lot of ground, but not very well. Enjoy!
P.S. Why doesn't Justin know what Juggalos are?
Martin W. Bender
Maybe I’m just being nitpicky, but it seems like Thom Rainer only writes one book. As I read through Who Moved My Pulpit I couldn’t help but be reminded of I am a Church Member and The Unexpected Journey. It might be because all these books share similar content (they all deal with church leadership, something Rainer certainly knows a lot about) or maybe there is a higher level of repetition in his writing than I’m used to, but it will probably be a while before I crack open another of his works. With that little caveat in mind, let’s talk about why you should always lift with your legs when moving a pulpit.
Who Moved My Pulpit is a book about how to lead change in a congregation. It may surprise some to hear that good leaders are always interested in change, but it’s the truth. Leadership is moving others toward a preferable future – notice all the change language in that statement. There is movement, that movement is directive, the destination is superior to the current location, and it is forward in time. Those are four change terms used in defining leadership. I bring all this up because the readers of this article are most likely members of the congregation I pastor and might be interested to know how I define successful leadership.
Rainer doesn’t make any incredible observations in this book. It is primarily a reminder that making changes in a congregation should be done slowly. He emphasizes prayer as the starting point and continues to repeat the need for prayer throughout the book. He also leaves the nature of the changes that need to be made up to the reader. This is very positive considering all the advice flying around the internet about church growth methodologies. Rainer assumes the reader understands the nature of the changes that ought to be made and outlines the ideal way to make it happen.
My favorite line is one he lifted from an earlier book: you make changes in a congregation the same way you eat an elephant – one bite at a time (it’s a paraphrase). At Glennville First Christian Church there are so many changes I’d like to make the task seems overwhelming. I make the joke that we are going to change everything twice before I’m done, but the reality is that I’d like to develop a love for change in the congregation so that it is one of our core values.
I may use Who Moved My Pulpit again, but it will likely be for the illustrations or to point congregants to an easily accessible book on leading through change.
Rainer, Thom S. Who Moved My Pulpit: Leading change in the church. (Nashville, Tennessee: B&H Publishing Group, 2016).
It isn't a party until Sweet Caroline is sung. You know that's the truth. Well, Justin and Martin start this party off with a little Neil Diamond and then wander into the holiday majesty of Sea World before ending up talking about the true meaning of Christmas. That's right folks, it's a Christmas episode you don't want to miss. Are otters the primadonnas of the pinnipeds? Does Santa's beard power the sleigh? Will all the Christmas programs be finished in time? All this and more will be answered in this very special Christmas episode of Two Bearded Preachers.
Does the Two Bearded Preachers podcast break the rules for acceptable behavior for pastoral people? Probably not. In this week's episode, Justin and Martin discuss the many benefits they receive from the podcast. There's a little bit of history told and the original plan of the show described, but it wasn't a good idea so the Bearded Brothers just started recording their regular conversations and the show got a lot better. Later in the episode, they talk about how they give advice to their congregations and the burden of eggnog.
Can a podcast be overly produced? The Two Bearded Preachers certainly don't think so, but it might be possible to overly produce a worship service. In this episode, Martin and Justin talk about sincerity in worship as they consider the implications of using decidedly secular music in the formal worship of the church. They also recount stories from their time in youth ministry and recognize that they are far more suited to the pulpit. Another area of discussion is men's health. Justin and Martin talk about the social awkwardness of the hernia test and tie it into their mutual love of podcasts. Oh, and Imagine Dragons rocks.
Trigger Warning: I will always assume your gender.
The American expression of Christianity is predominantly feminine. At least that’s the premise David Murrow bases his argument on in his church growth book Why Men Hate Going to Church. As I type this in the pastor’s study at my church, a study decorated by the ladies of the church, I can see his point. The furniture is decidedly girly with weird window treatments and Thomas Kincaid looking prints on the walls… I’m picking up what he’s putting down. The décor is symptomatic of a larger cultural phenomenon taking place where I minister, the ladies run the show.
This picture used to hang in my office. I replaced it with A New Hope poster Leia got me for Christmas a few years ago. You can see Ms. Anne's reflection in the bottom left corner.
At the risk of being called a He-man-woman-hater yet again by Leia (don’t worry, she’s joking, I think), it’s high time the church exhibit an equivalent amount of masculinity as femininity. Murrow draws attention to the fact that in America, the church has become increasingly influenced by women over the years. In an ever-feminizing environment, men feel increasingly out of place resulting in poor attendance, low interest, and lagging participation on the part of men. His assessment is that the decline in participation by men has inevitably led to a decline in overall attendance at church pointing specifically to mainline denominations to prove his point.
Now, it’s important to point out that correlation is not the same as causation. Yes, the mainline denominations are more feminized than evangelical congregations. Yes, the mainline is losing membership faster than their evangelical counterparts. That does not necessarily mean the one has caused the other. I would argue that theology, particularly whether a group holds to a high view of scripture, is more likely to be the cause of decline, but as neither Murrow nor I have studied that relationship we are left to disagree. Where I do agree with the author is in the need for churches to be more intentional about engaging men with the Gospel.
The heart of the book is pointing out the areas where men are marginalized in America’s churches and suggesting ways to shift toward gender neutral appeal. This is perhaps the most surprising part of the book. Murrow never says to hang up a deer head (although I don’t see the harm in it), but to take down the doilies, cross stitched last suppers (I took one of these down in my church), and images of Jesus depicting him as soft. He recommends removing the things that are overtly feminine and begin to offer ministry opportunities where men can shine.
I took this down from the fellowship hall. I know someone put a ton of time into making it, but come on, people! This thing is just weird.
Men like a challenge, competition, and accomplishment. Too much of church language fails to communicate the challenge inherent in the gospel message. The Great Commission says to make disciples, but there is precious little discipline in today’s church. The standards have been relaxed to make sure people’s feelings aren’t hurt, completely neglecting the fact that some people deserve to have their feelings hurt. The wishy-washy results are congregations with no standards, goals, or momentum. No wonder men have lost interest, too many churches just aren’t trying to do anything. Maybe a swift kick in the pants is in order?
To reference a slightly less practical book (Fight Club), Murrow took what was on the tip of everyone’s tongue and gave it a name. Most of what he writes resonates strongly with me as my church is very much the feminized group he describes. It’s almost as if he was walking through sanctuary here in Glennville. I’ve already begun shifting to a more male friendly approach and have seen the beginning of positive results. My concern is to make this transition without alienating the ladies who have worked very hard in their ministries but have unintentionally made the church less accessible to men.
If you'd like to know the secret to a perfect Thanksgiving turkey the Two Bearded Preachers can clue you in... it's butter. Either that or Boston Market, it's a bit of a toss up. In this week's conversation, the fellers talk about their new electronics (an iPhone 7 and an Xbox One S), discuss what to do when a prepubescent joins your party, and talk about the importance of maxing and relaxing. Will Justin be able to survive the tamest attraction in Kissimmee? Will Martin be able to make it through the show without running to the bathroom? These and other mysteries are solved in the 60th episode of the greatest episodic history of the Two Bearded Preachers' friendship. This episode is #1. Don't doubt it for a minute.
It's Thanksgiving and the Two Bearded Preachers are taking a well deserved week off. We didn't want to leave you high and dry, so here is a re-release of our very first episode. It is too long, has terrible editing, and sounds like absolute garbage. We think you'll love it. It will also help you to see how far we've come in putting these things together. So check it out, but we won't be hurt if you decide to keep this one to yourselves. Enjoy.
How many VCRs should you take when looting an electronics store? Does hand holding lead to baby making? How many days in a row can a man eat steak before it isn't delicious? These and other questions are answered in the latest episode of Two Bearded Preachers! Listen to how Martin and Justin would respond in a protest/riot scenario and hear their traditional Molotov Cocktail recipes. This one is a real barn burner, but kindly remember not to literally burn down any barns. We wouldn't want anyone to be charged with a hate crime against the livestock.
Martin W. Bender
It’s taken me a while to get through this book. It deals with a subject I’ve not thought terribly deeply on and thus I’ve reread most of the book and probably have gone through the whole thing twice. I can understand the concern for upholding the Classical understanding of God when it is being challenged in both academic and popular writing. It’s certainly a little telling that I’ve not been challenged on the subject in over ninety hours of graduate study. This is an area (theology proper) that deserves more careful consideration from pastors like me as it ultimately effects the ministry I perform.
Closing Comments and Affirmations and Denials by Ronald S. Baines and Charles J. Rennie
Open and Process Theism and the influence they have in today’s theology are the primary cause of the rise of alternative interpretations of divine impassibility. Both these positions hold that God is not atemporal and eternal as he has been classically understood, rather that his nature possesses potentiality regarding creation. Criticism that an impassible God is somehow cold and distant springs from the idea that God’s experience of emotions is the same as man’s. This is a grave error. Man’s emotions are like God’s, but his are not like ours. Both Open and Process Theism fail to properly understand the Creator/creation distinctive and ultimately make God in the image of man: passible.
In this final chapter, there is a list of affirmations and denials that is most helpful. It lists all the positions discussed through the course of the book and succinctly reviews them. For those interested in reading the book, I recommend beginning with the affirmations and denials first to understand the perspective of the writers. I probably would have gotten through the book more quickly had I done so.
I must say; I agree with affirmation 24.
Appendix 1: Charles J. Rennie’s Review of God with Us: Divine Condescension and the Attributes of God by K. Scott Oliphint
I’ve not read Oliphint’s book, but I have enjoyed the articles I’ve seen by him and the interviews I’ve listened to. I’m a little surprised he holds to an alternative view of impassibility. I agree with the review’s criticism that there needn’t be a new theological category created to answer Open and Process Theism as Classical Theism, as it’s been traditionally held, stands up better under criticism and has greater biblical support than today’s alternatives. When the Hellenization criticism is accepted of Classical Theism then it makes sense to attempt an answer that allows for covenant passions, but since that criticism is questionable at best there remains little reason to abandon the biblical and historically supported position.
Appendix 2: James E. Dolezal’s Review of God is Impassible and Impassioned: Toward a Theology of Divine Emotion by Rob Lister
Unlike Oliphint, I’ve not heard of Lister. That doesn’t mean a whole lot as I’m just beginning to seriously explore Reformed theologians. The review points to the greatest issue I have with passibility or altered views of impassibility, namely, that in any such view God cannot be rightly thought of as atemporally eternal. That might not be a big deal for many people, but once God’s atemporality is removed so too is his eternity, omniscience, omni anything, really. And that’s a problem because the Bible describes God in these ways. Any position that denies God’s perfection in all things must be dismissed as unbiblical and outside Christian thought.
As I put Confessing the Impassible God on the shelf, relegating it to reference use for the foreseeable future, I find myself moving ever closer to becoming confessional. My own theological journey departed from its projected course quite a while ago during post-work conversations at UPS, Bible studies at Arifjan, and in my own kitchen working on papers for school. I’ve gone from refusing to sign a membership card at my church to exploring the historic confessions and finding they are far more consistent theologically than anything I experienced in the non-denominational, anti-creedal world in which I was raised. As I continue to study I set my eye on a monster of text: Calvin’s Institutes of the Christian Religion. I can’t believe I’ve been a student of theology this long and still haven’t read what is commonly regarded as the most significant work of the Reformation. Well, it’s the 500th anniversary of old Martin Luther causing a ruckus next year… I better get this bad boy started.
Baines, Ronald S., Richard C. Barcellos, James P. Butler, Stefan T. Lindblad, James M. Renihan eds. Confessing the Impassible God: The Biblical, Classical, & Confessional Doctrine of Divine Impassibility. (Palmdale, CA: RBAP, 2015).
Martin W. Bender
Seeing how the doctrine of impassibility effects both confessional thinking and pastoral ministry is both interesting and helpful to a feller like me. While I’m not confessional in my faith, I am increasingly interested in the history Protestant confessions and how they impact modern theology. As a minister, I am fascinated to see how seemingly distant theological concepts can be applied to practical ministry and everyday life. These two chapters speak to both areas, making them some of my favorites so far in the book.
Confessional Theology and the Doctrine of Divine Impassibility by James M. Renihan
Since this book is written from a confessional Reformed Baptist perspective it is no surprise it contains a chapter exploring the doctrine of impassibility as it exists in the Second London Confession of Faith. The 2LCF is clearly an expression of Christianity that holds to divine impassibility as it has been historically understood. This chapter is quite convincing in articulating how the impassibility of God is a key element in the second chapter of the 2LCF and a fundamental assumption for the confession as a whole. The most relevant phrase describes God as “without body, parts, or passions.”
As a reader who does not hold to a confession, the dispute over the nature of God’s emotional state remains distant. I can certainly see the complaint of the writers of this book as they clearly demonstrate how failing to hold to the traditional understanding of impassibility leads to an inevitable mutability on the part of God. At the same time, I doubt there will be significant problems for apologists created by those who hold to an augmented view. As the book draws toward its conclusion I can see how augmented views on impassibility undermine the way the 2LCF has traditionally been interpreted. Such undermining may impact the viability of the confession in the long term.
Practical Theology and the Doctrine of Divine Impassibility by James P. Butler
Practical theology is where the rubber meets the road for most of us. It is in the chapter on practical theology the doctrine of impassibility is shown to be a great comfort for the believer as all hope is predicated on the belief in God’s eternal reliability. If there is the possibility of change in God’s emotions there remains the possibility that God’s love for his people will wane, or at the very least, has the potential to be greater than what it is at any given moment. This would mean God’s love would at points lack the perfection that seems to be a requirement of an eternal God. When the impassibility of God is denied there is no reasonable assurance to be had by the believer that his promises are applicable individually and therefore, no reasonable hope to be had.
Pastorally, God’s impassibility is a great help to those who are in the midst of trial. The finite nature of mankind means we all will undergo change and have both potentiality and actuality (remember, God only has actuality). When the change we undergo is undesirable to us, the knowledge that our God loves us perfectly in our suffering is quite a blessing. Despite the struggles of the world, those in Christ have confidence in his unchanging nature. Helping fellow Christians to see God’s presence in their distress is a wonderful opportunity to explore the vastness of his love.
As Confessing the Impassible God comes to its conclusion I find myself increasingly interested in the historic confessions. Confessional Christianity isn’t the theme of the book and doesn’t make a case for the reader to adhere to a confession (rather, it assumes adherence), but it does demonstrate how a well thought out and documented confession can point out errors in one’s personal theology. The challenge for those who are less systematic in their faith, like me, is to be consistent while sharpening their positions based upon the Bible. All in Christ have a responsibility to grow in their knowledge and appreciation for him. Exploring the historic confessions is an opportunity to do that very thing.
Baines, Ronald S., Richard C. Barcellos, James P. Butler, Stefan T. Lindblad, James M. Renihan eds. Confessing the Impassible God: The Biblical, Classical, & Confessional Doctrine of Divine Impassibility. (Palmdale, CA: RBAP, 2015).
This just in... the Two Bearded Preachers officially endorse Nathan Fillion for President of the United States of America. Who could be better than the man who tamed the outer planets? In other news, Aladdin is outed as a pervy creeper and Justin cheats on Martin by talking to another preacher. They are able to make amends though as John Morgan is finally able to get Florida to legalize medicinal marijuana. Keep an eye on Justin, he has been having joint problems lately. Oh, they also mention that feller who won the election. What was his name again?